Beautiful Disaster
by Priestess of the Myrmidon
Summary: Briseis does many things, including remember her time with Achilles. Well, a new thing, but it's (quite obviously) my regular topic, AB, but most certainly different, and not very dependent on the movie. Just R&R... please? You know you want to.


**Title**: Beautiful Disaster  
**Author**: Priestess of the Myrmidon  
**Rating**: PG  
**Genre**: Romance/Angst  
**Summary**: Well, a new thing, but it's (quite obviously) my regular topic, A/B, but most certainly different, and not very dependent on the movie. Just R&R... please? You know you want to._  
_**Disclaimer**: I don't own any of it, unless I wrote it and it's not from the movie. I am not so cracked in the head as to believe I do. If you think that and wish to sue me, I suggest you take a long walk... off of a short pier.  
**Disclaimer2**: I do not own this song's lyrics.  
**A/N**: Uhh... I don't have one. Wait, yes I do! Ummm... you guys know the drill, italicized in paragraph is thoughts or emphasis. The **_bold italics _**is the lyrics to 'Beautiful Disaster' by Kelly Clarkson. And _italics_ in its own paragraph is a dream. And as y'all know, this'll be _UN-HOMER LIKE!_ I repeat, un-homer like, because this is the Troy section, duh!  
**A/N2**: I used my artistic license and fooled around a little with the script, partly because I couldn't remember it all. Whatever. Also, the memories/whatever they are, are in no order, so if you go, but it didn't happen before or after this, that's because there is no order in my fic.  
**A/N3:** Also, some of these memories are shorter because frankly, I kinda got stuck. Deal with it.

_**He drowns in his dreams  
An exquisite extreme I know  
He's as damned as he seems  
More Heaven than a heart could hold  
And if I tried to save him  
My whole world could cave in  
Just ain't right  
Lord just ain't right**_

"What's your name?" he asked her, staring at his new slave. She was pretty girl. Young, not a beautiful woman, but she was lovely all the same with her brown, curly hair, her big, brown, soulful eyes, her porcelain skin and her beautiful body. He knew, given a year or two more, she would striking woman to behold.

The priestess refused to answer, and he tried a new tactic: provoking. "Come now, even the servants of Apollo have names."

"You killed Apollo's priests!" she accused, dodging around his question. Who did he think he was? A god?

"Interesting name," he told her with another smirk. "I kill men who defend their countries…but I don't kill priests," said Achilles in a more serious tone.

"Then your men did! The sun god will have his vengeance!" she said rambling on and on. She glanced over at the man, and quickly averted her eyes, blushing. The man was naked as the day he was born. Had he no shame?

"Well, then what's he waiting for?" Achilles saw Briseis' reaction, and it amused him greatly. He was a little startled as he'd spent much of his companionship with concubines. Of course, she was a virgin priestess. So she was sheltered. He'd forgotten. He rolled his eyes, and scrubbed his face, washing the blood and dirt off his face.

"The right time to strike!" she angrily. He flicked water at her and she flinched as the cool liquid touched her skin.

"His priests are dead and his acolytes are captive…I think your god is afraid of me." Achilles grinned, and Briseis was surprised it wasn't predatorial. This man is a good actor.

"Afraid!" she sputtered indignantly._ You great fool, _Briseis thought to herself. _Apollo will strike you down._ "Apollo is master of the sun…he fears nothing!" _You are a mortal, and he is a god, who do you think will win a fight between you two?_ Did he not fear Apollo's wrath? Did he want to die? How foolish could this man be?

"Then where is he, my little priestess?" Achilles was amused, and his posture relaxed, which seemed to vex his new slave girl.

"You're nothing but a killer!" she snapped. Achilles did not fail to notice she didn't answer his question. In a quieter tone, she added: "You wouldn't know anything about the gods! Have you no shame? He'll strike you down easily! Repent your sins and he will spare you!"

"Worried for me now, are you?" he said as if he were truly curious, raising a golden eyebrow, although he already knew what the answer would be.

"The sky will fall before I worry for you, you _killer_! You, you-" she searched for something to say that was vile enough to describe him. "You arrogant _goat_!" Again he smirked. Briseis stopped talking before she made a fool of herself.

"You're royalty aren't you? Spent years talking down to men." Achilles could see she was royalty. The way she talked, the way she held herself. He strode over to her and fingered some of her hair. "Definitely royalty. So tell me little priestess, what's your name?" She shot him a glare of pure hatred. "Come now, what's the harm of a name?" She ignored him stubbornly. Achilles shrugged, if she refused to tell him, that was fine with him. Silence reined.

Finally: "Briseis," she whispered.

"So, _Briseis_, are you scared?"

"Should I be?" she shot back at him. Achilles laughed. What a feisty little thing she was!

"No," he said honestly. "You're the only Trojan who can say that."

_**Oh and I don't know  
I don't know what he's after  
But he's so beautiful  
He's such a beautiful disaster  
And if I could hold on  
Through the tears and the laughter  
Oh would it be beautiful  
Or just a beautiful disaster**_

Briseis lifted her head off of Achilles' shoulders, and gazed out the straps of leather that were the door. Still night time. The priestess, _former_, priestess blushed as she remembered that nights activities. It'd been an interesting night, but she didn't regret it. She sent a prayer of apologies to Apollo, and his sister, Artemis. She preferred the fact that her virginity had been taken by Achilles out of passion, (and _what _else, she wondered,) over being ravenged by some soldier out there.

She lowered her head, back onto his arms, and beat the urge (just barely) down to giggle. The Great Achilles looked so feminine, so weak when he slept. He also slept with his head upon her bare shoulder, one of his hands lay entangled in the woman's freed hair, the other arm was flung over her breasts.

With a groan, the warrior then raised his head, his sleep disturbed by Briseis' movements. _He sleeps extremely lightly_, Briseis thought. _But then, he needs to because he's a warrior._

"Enjoy earlier?" he said with a wicked grin as her cheeks flush a dark, beet red. She pulled the sheets a little higher so that they shielded her from his view. "Why do that?" he asked her. "It's not like I've already seen _all_ of you."

"Yes," she replied honestly to his earlier question, and it took him a moment to comprehend which statement she was replying to. He grinned.

_**His magic and myth  
As strong as what I believe  
A tragedy with  
More damage than a soul should see  
And do I try to change him  
So hard not to blame him  
Hold me tight  
Baby hold me tight**_

"Am I still your captive?" she whispered to Achilles as they lay in his bed. "Am I still a prisoner of the Great Achilles?"

"You are my guest."

"In Troy guests can leave whenever they wish," she said, praying silently.

"Would you leave Troy?" Achilles' heart clenched. He'd grown fond of this woman.

"Would you leave this war behind?" she returned, avoiding his question.

"Yes," was the reply. "Would come home with me?"

"As your Trojan concubine?" she asked. She had to know.

"No."

"Then as what?"

"As my lover. I care for you Briseis." _I love you._ Achilles was afraid that she didn't love him like the others had. Silence, and then Achilles decided to say it. "I love you." More silence. The warrior laughed bitterly to himself and cursed. What irony! The one woman he loved was the one woman did not love him. All others had loved him, but he had not returned it. And he loved Briseis, but Briseis did not love him. What pure, total irony! "Briseis I-"

"I love you, Achilles." Achilles sighed with relief, releasing the breath he hadn't realized he was holding, and then lowered his head and kissed her.

_**Oh and I don't know  
I don't know what he's after  
But he's so beautiful  
He's such a beautiful disaster  
And if I could hold on  
Through the tears and the laughter  
Oh would it be beautiful  
Or just a beautiful disaster**_

She gazed at him sadly, as she stepped up onto the chariot, brown hair whipping about her in the wind. Priam, her uncle, glanced at her with the love of a father, and then snapped the reins, and the horses started moving along.

"He loves you," he told Briseis as they rode back to Troy, breaking the uncomfortable silence. "You can see it in his eyes." _The eyes of a killer. The eyes of a liar. The eyes of the man who took my beloved Hector from us._

"And I him," she said bravely, wondering what his reaction would be to her confession. She needed to tell _someone body_. She couldn't tell Andromache, for fear of what the woman would do. Not Paris either. While she loved her cousin, she couldn't trust him to keep a secret for a long period of time.

"Yes," he said. "And I was wondering if you'd be honest with me. But tell me, niece, how can you love him know in he killed Hector, and countless Trojans?"

"Because I've seen the real Achilles. The man behind the armor, and myth." Priam raised a silver eyebrow.

"Not meaning to crush your love, my dear, but how do you know it is not acting?" _He is a mighty good actor. And he'll break my niece's heart._

"Because I just know, Uncle. Trust me I know." And then she broke down. "Oh, I'm a wretched Trojan, to fall in love with my country's greatest enemy!" she sobbed. Priam wrapped an arm around her, and held the reins in the other one.

"'Tis not your fault. 'Tis the will of the gods," he told her.

"You say that, but how do you know?" she demanded brokenly and angrily for her uncle. "How do you know?" He was silent. "Do not lie to me, Uncle!" _Just don't! I've had enough of lies!_

"I know love, and I see it in the your eyes, and his. You need not worry Briseis, I will not tell anybody. I shall leave it for you to say."

"Thank you. Thank you so much, Uncle!"

_**I'm longing for love and the logical  
But he's only happy hysterical  
I'm waiting for some kind of miracleI  
Waiting so long**_

"Damn you!" she whispered fiercely, gazing at him while the warrior slept. _"Damn you!" _Damn the man she loved, the man who should be her enemy, not the man she loved. Damn Achilles, the "cold-hearted" warrior. Damn him to Hades! "Why did you make me love you? Why will you kill him?" Briseis recalled her horrible dream. She just _knew_ that this _would_ happen.

_"Hector!" shouted the warrior. "HECTOR!" He paused, and then continued screaming Hector's name, breathing deeply and quickly, his face livid. Hector, the poor man, got up, and started speaking quietly with his father, and then Paris in turn. _

_He grabbed his spear and helmet, and walked down the stairs. Halfway down was his beloved wife, Andromache. Briseis could _hear_ his heart pound. She could read the fear in his eyes. She realized that her cousin knew this was his end. Knew that Achilles would kill him. Knew that he would never see his family again in this side of the world._

_"Don't go!" said Andromache desperately. _

_"Please, Hector!" Briseis added to the pleas, but strangely, they could not hear her. _

Please_!" Hector shook his head, and they embraced and kissed fearfully, knowing it would be their last. Astyanax, somehow sensing the fear and tension in the air, started to wail. He hefted his shield and spear, and then left quietly, not looking back, knowing he would not be able to go through with this is he did._

_Briseis, not thinking, ran up to her cousin, and embraced him, and planted a loving good-bye kiss on his cheek. Hector paused, as a chill swept over him, and then continued, leaving Briseis and Andromache staring desperately at the man who they both loved in different ways, as he went to his demise. _

_The gates of Troy creaked open, and Hector glanced back at the very woman who had caused this war. Helen stared back at him, tears welling in her lovely eyes, but they did not spill over._

_Hector serenely strode out to meet the waiting Achilles._

_Hector spoke first. "I thought it was you who I was fighting, and I wish it were. But let us make a pact: the victor gives the body to his people. I may have killed him, but I gave the dead boy the honor he deserved." Sickeningly, Briseis realized he was talking about Patroclus. _I have to stop this from happening! _she thought._

_"You gave him the honor of your sword." He then continued viciously. "You won't have ears tonight. You won't have eyes or a tongue. You will wander the underworld deaf, blind and dumb-and all the ghost will know: this is Hector. The fool who thought he had killed Achilles." He angrily reached up and tugged off the helmet, with his golden hair tussled like a lion's mane, and pointed it at his enemy. "Now you know who you are fighting." He tossed it to the ground. Hector pulled his off and too dropped it onto the dusty ground._

_The two charged at each other. Their spears and shields clanged. Achilles lunged, and Hector barely blocked the attack. He retreated, but the Myrmidon ran at him, leaped into the air, and jabbed down with his weapon. Again Hector blocked it, and Achilles' admiration for the Prince of Troy grew. _

_Achilles jabbed, and Hector barely missed his head being skewered on the spear. He swung back at him, and barely missed _his_ target. Suddenly, Hector's spear caught in the ground, and it broke. The prince of Troy tossed aside the remains of the spear, and charged, trapping Achilles' spear underneath his shield, and used his shin armor to break it. He drew his sword and swung. _

_The blond warrior barely blocked it. They traded blows, and their swords and shields rung, the sound rippling through the otherwise eerily silent Troy._

_They exchanged blows, and the Myrmidon shoved him back. Again, they fiercely met in a small spar, but it was Hector who pushed Achilles back, and Hector who sliced at Achilles. He sliced the leather of Achilles' armor, and the son of Thetis gazed down at it. He wasted no time in following up his attack, and tried to run his enemy through he missed, and Achilles swung up and jabbed down with his sword. Hector barely blocked it. Achilles shoved him back. Hector tripped on a rock, and his sword flew out of his hand. _

_Briseis winced for her cousin, and averted her face, sure that Achilles would kill him. But he did not. "Get up. Get up prince of Troy." He tossed his shield away. "I won't let a stone take my glory." _Is _that _what you fight for? _Hector thought, but used the opportunity to crawl over and grab his sword and the fragment of his spear._

_He rose, and lunged for the other man. Achilles spun and gracefully avoided the spear and sliced open Hector's thigh. Hector let out only a groan and kept up his guard. Achilles switched sword hands and swung up, but Hector moved out of the way._ _Both stared at each other just panting, trying to catch their breath, and a trickle of sweat ran down the side of Achilles' head._

_And so the fight went on._

_Then, suddenly, Achilles grabbed the spear fragment from the hand of her cousin, and with a rather elaborate twirl, slammed the spear into Hector's heart. Briseis could not look away. She just _could not

_Her cousin dropped to his knees gasping for air, and Achilles speared him with his sword. Briseis jumped, and then started to cry. _

_"NO!" she screamed, all the while knowing he couldn't hear her. "Why did you do that Achilles? WHY DID YOU KILL HIM WHEN I ASKED YOU NOT TO?" Surprisingly, the man glanced up at her, as if he'd heard her. _

_Then, he stalked over to his chariot, grabbed a length of rope from it, and then knelt beside Hector. Startled, she realized what he would do. "I hate you, Achilles, son of Peleus and Thetis! Do you hear me?" He hesitated again as if he'd heard the words that'd come out of her mouth, but he then continued with his task. "Why are you doing this?" she whispered. And then woke up._

"Briseis?" he asked groggily. She'd forgotten he was such a light sleeper.

"Promise me you won't kill him!"

"What?" he asked, extremely confused. Who was 'him?'

"Hector. Promise me." What she saw made her face fall.

"I'm sorry, Briseis. I can't do that, my little priestess." She didn't smile as she normally did when he used that endearment, and frankly, he hadn't expected her to. "I'm sorry," he said softly. "But I'll do my best not to confront him. Besides, when will I see him? We're leaving soon anyways."

"You're going to dishonor him," she whispered.

"Oh?" he asked raising an eyebrow. "And when will I do this?"

"After he kills Patroclus." Raising her brown eyes to meet his blue ones, she said. "Please don't."

"Hector'll not touch him!" he snapped.

"Don't be so sure," she murmured to both herself and Achilles. "Don't trust Patroclus to not do anything foolish. The fool has more battle lust than you could imagine." Then: "Achilles?"

"Yes?"

"I love you, no matter what. Know that." Achilles was confused, but shrugged it off.

"And I you, Briseis." Then back to the subject of Hector.

"Please don't kill him. _Please._ I'll do anything. He's happy with Andromache and Astyanax. Please."

"I'm sorry. I just can't promise anything when it comes to war." Her head dropped, and Achilles had never, in his entire life, felt so gods' damned horrible.

_**  
He's soft to the touch  
But frayed at the ends he breaks  
He's never enough  
And still he's more than I can take**_

"He's my cousin," Briseis whispered into his chest as they lay on his bed, entwined in the other's arms. "Hector's a good man." Achilles stiffened, but said nothing to her. There was no sign that he was listening to her besides his reaction. "Do not kill him. Please, I'm begging you!" A tear slid down her cheek. In the back of her mind, she knew that Achilles would not relent.

Achilles glanced at his lover, and his face hardened. "He killed Patroclus!"

"Yes, and he thought it was you! What would you have done differently? _Oh mighty one? _Patroclus knew the consequences!" snapped Briseis.

"But he still killed Patroclus!"

"And how many brothers, cousins or fathers have _you _killed? How many, great Achilles? And you'll add my cousin to the list of them." The former priestess rolled out of his arms and as far away from him on the bed. "Here I was, thinking you weren't a cold blooded killer, who loved only glory and blood shed," she said angrily, not caring if she hurt or provoked the man. "That you had a heart. What a fool I was!"

"_Briseis_-"

"Don't you dare 'Briseis' me!" she snarled at him, slapping away the hand he reached out with to stroke her hair out of her eyes. _Does he think to placate me with his body? With his "care"? If he truly cares about me, he would not kill Hector! _"I thought you cared about me! I thought I wasn't just another whore! I was a double fool!" she ranted quietly to herself. "I hate you!" she whispered. "You'll kill Hector!"

"Briseis I-" he started again.

"Don't lie to me!"

"I'm-" He was cut off yet again by Briseis.

"Don't! I don't want to hear any more of your lies!"

"Damn you Briseis! I care about you, I do! You have nothing, _nothing,_ to do with me fighting Hector tomorrow!" the warrior said forcefully, trying to make her understand the _why_ of his actions.

"Do you wonder what our lives would now be like if he hadn't fought him?" she whispered, ignoring what he had just said to her.

"Every minute," he replied truthfully.

"You know," she told him. "Agamemnon _wants_ you to fight Hector. All know that you'll kill him. And then Troy will fall." Briseis tried desperately to convince him. To convince him not to kill Hector. Achilles hesitated, then rolled over and gathered her in his arms.

"I shall fight him tomorrow, my lovely priestess, whether you like it or not. I _must _fight him."

"Apollo has cursed you, Achilles." He froze. Was this Apollo speaking or his lover? "No, 'tis me," she said reading his expression, "but I'm positive that should you fight Hector tomorrow and kill him, 'twill be your death. I don't know how I know this, but I do." _I do not want either you or Hector to die! Strange to want that for your enemy._

"My mother, Thetis, told me I shall die here in Troy. That my name will be remembered, but I will die." Briseis sensed that was not all to what he had to say. She also knew he would not talk unless asked.

"And if you stayed in Phita?"

"That I would find love. That my name would be forgotten in generations to come." The priestess knew whether it was play or not, she loved him. She loved her captor. She loved the Great Achilles as countless women had before her. She was helplessly in love. What a beautiful disaster.

_**Oh cuz I don't know  
I don't know what he's after  
But he's so beautiful  
he's such a beautiful disaster  
And if I could hold on  
Through the tears and the laughter  
Oh would it be beautiful  
Or just a beautiful disaster**_

"Andromache? There- there is something I must tell you," Briseis said softly, not meeting her eyes. There was fear in her eyes and it was written on her face plainly. _But fear from what?_ Andromache had wondered idly. What was she scared of? Did she think the Greeks were following them? Were they? Had she spotted them? Fear for Astyanax swirled up in Andromache.

"Yes Briseis?" she asked. The poor girl shuffled her sandaled feet. She was extremely nervous of something. What was it? "Come now, Briseis, you are family, I will not hurt you." Briseis smiled sadly remembering something. "Briseis, what's the matter?" the princess of the fallen Troy demanded.

"Well... I'm afraid to tell you..." her voice wavered and she gave her a supporting smile. "I'm with child!" she blurted out. Her smile faded. Andromache felt conflicting emotions: sadness, happiness, and hatred. She was happy for Briseis, she hated Achilles, and she was sad that Hector could not be here; so was Briseis. She stared at her with wide, frightened eyes. "You heard me- yes?" _Oh, Apollo this is too much to handle! _thought both women.

"It's _his _child, is it not?" Andromache spat, knowing the answer and she instantly regretted her harsh words. That had been too much for Briseis, the tears spilled down her cheeks.

"I-I'm sorry," she forced out and fled before Andromache had a chance to apologize for what she had said. Why had she said that? The princess instantly chased after her and caught up to her easily. She spun her around and met the red, swollen eyes of her cousin-in-law.

"I forgive you, and 'tis not your fault," she told Briseis. "I guess it is the will of the gods; I cannot be angry at you for something that is not your fault." Briseis then proceeded to stare at her cousin-in-law in utter disbelief.

"That's it? You-you forgive me?" the stunned girl asked me, her voice cracking. "Oh, Andromache, I do not deserve your kindness! I cannot tell you how much I thank you! I'm so, so sorry."

"For what?"

"I could not convince Achilles to not kill him." Tears welled in Andromache's eyes as she watched her cousin-in-law blame herself for Hector's death. She gathered Briseis in her arms.

"'Tis not your fault, my dear Briseis. 'Tis not your fault."

_What a beautiful disaster, _thought Briseis. _What a gods damned beautiful disaster._

_**He's beautiful  
Oh he's so beautiful  
He's beautiful **_

The end! Yay! Now leave a review. Go on, I _dare_ you!

Priestess


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